The beauty of the new year

The beauty of the new year is that, no matter how hard or tough your last year was, you have the ability to start all over.  To let go of all the things from the past, the things you could’ve done, didn’t do, shouldn’t have done, would’ve done but didn’t.. and just start with a nice clean slate.

To rebuild, recreate, refine, renew!  To live the life that we dreamed of.  Sure, we may fall, and blunder, but we will rise, get back up again, and keep going.

So here’s to the new year, the adventures ahead, the challenges we shall vanquish, the people we shall meet, the good things we shall do, and the smiles, tears and laughs we will share in the year to come!

 

Rainy days.

  rain animated GIF

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There’s something about rainy days that makes everything seem more vibrant and real.  Despite the fact that I had three umbrellas at work, I glanced at the window and decided to take my chances and went without one.  It started raining.

The strange thing was that it felt nice.  The rain sprinkling on my face and hair.  It felt nice to kinda feel the rain.  I felt a little bit more alive.

So today, I felt like walking a bit, in the rain, in a long dress and flats.  I get to the burrito place, order food and a beer, and take out my notebook.  I watch people outside and wonder, where are they going? What are they thinking about? 

And me.  Where will I be in 5 years?  What will I do?  This mini-wave of panic hits me.  Friends are getting married, having kids, building lives and houses and joint-bank accounts together.  This culture imbues the idea that we should have things figured out, have our lives prepared and pre-ordered and manufactured for maximum satisfaction: the 2 kids, white picket fence, house in the ‘burbs, and a 401K. 

Then I start to breathe a little bit.  And I think of all the things that happened within the last few years.  I never thought I’d be a teacher. I never thought I’d move to Korea.  I never thought I’d find someone amazing and that I’d fall in love.  All of the things that have happened were things that I never could have even dreamed.  So I think that everything will be okay.  Not even okay, amazing.  So, no, I don’t have any idea of what I’m going to do, or what’s in store for me, in five years.  But I think I’ll be okay.